Saturday, December 29, 2012

The Discipline of Dress: Dressing For The Home

It's fair to say I take dressing very seriously. I genuinely leave the house every day with the intention of outdressing the enemy. But until recently I've been more than content to sit around the house in sweats or pjs all day. Until one day I noticed that Amiira never does that. And even when she does wear sweats or pjs they are cool looking and considered. Nothing she wears says "I failed today" And I realized part of the reason I have so much respect for her as a woman and a mother is that she has that much respect for herself. Because of what we do, or don't do, we are home a lot. Having just won a long battle with depression I decided it might behoove to to put the Amiira dressing for the house plan into effect. First I gave away all the clothes I have that are half ass: Shitty sweats, sad pjs and dirty ill fitting t-shirts all gone. Everything I own I love. Seriously. I have far fewer clothes but clothes that make me feel good every time I put them on. Then I decided no matter what I'm doing, even if I'm going to work out or just drive the kids to school I take a shower, shave, use my various skin care items and dress, all before rewarding myself with coffee. It sounds dumb, and fussy, but God damn it makes a difference. And the more days in a row you do it the more it begins to feel like any discipline you partake in that's meant to better your enjoyment of life. There's a certain pride that comes with looking the best you can every day. I can't tell you how much better I feel because of it. Its a way of letting yourself and the world know that you take this life shit seriously and thats why, even when you are home alone, you outdress the enemy!


  1. Fantastic post. I feel the same way about dressing at home and out in the world. I feel cute and cozy at home. It lightens my mood for sure.

    Big hugs,

  2. You failed today.

    Just kidding. Happy New Year!

  3. This is a thought-provoking post, and here's what I think.

    You have posed a question of identity here, from what I can tell, and not just in this post. The entire concept of your costume as a vehicle of competition is a really strong idea. I love it. Who are you and how does that influence your dress? Or, how do you choose to dress, and how does that impact who you are? Something like that, right?

    When I used to wear a suit and tie to work, any perhaps not love each work day, I would often remove the tie as soon as I was walking to the car at the end of the day. Upon reaching home, I would quickly change into either shorts and a t-shirt or sweats - usually a hoodie since I am a bald son-of-a-buck and live in the cold Northeastern US.

    Yet now, when I find myself in upper management, I consciously eschew casual Friday, and increasingly find myself changing into casual clothing at home instead of always going for the shorts in warm weather or sweats in cold weather. I recently purchased a wrist watch after years of looking to my smartphone for the time of day. Boys look to their phones, I thought. Men wear a watch. I spend the extra on dry cleaning each week to ensure my button-down shirts and flat-front slacks are crisp and carry a statement. Makes a difference, at least to me. Projects what I want to project. Embodies having your act together.

    Having said all that, it's 9:38 PM on the east coast, and I have sweats on. There are also eight inches of snow on the ground and it's below 30 degrees outside. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

  4. I may have come out to strongly against sweats. But if you are going to wear them make them sweats that matter. There are attractive, cool stylish sweats and pjs. Hell pajama's can be downright stunning but make either of those a choice not a default. Let no clothes you wear dictate failure. Any choice can work as long as it's a considered choice in your favor!

  5. Living in South Florida as I do, most of my non-work attire tends to consist of denim shorts and Estoy Merchandise t-shirts, year-round. I guess that makes me kind of a bro. I would like to class up my casual wear, but it's just not practical to rock slacks, a button-down shirt and a cardigan while sweating my freaking balls off.

  6. Was just talking about this post today with Jess. Ever since reading it the first time I feel like a downright failure when I do not get clean and dressed for the day. It is now 2:45 and I am still in my sleepwear.

  7. Because of what we do, or don't do, we are home scoop neck dress